Vital Football

That's Odds

That's Odds

Gone in 64 seconds!

I`m feeling a little bit inadequate. Apparently, a normal male averages 20 minutes when expressing his love physically; I`m assuming that includes the taxi journey and the queue for the cashpoint.

My haste is a blessing in disguise for the wife, as she`s on the phone to her mother every 15 minutes. Her old dear doesn`t want to hear my shrieking voice; again.

On the subject of hidden blessings, Arsenal may well benefit from the absence of Thierry Henry. The Gunners have looked a more cohesive unit without their talismanic captain this season, the 4/1 about an Arsenal win at the Bridge should be jumped on; but not for too long.

Robin Van Persie can open the scoring at 17/2. The little Dutchman`s left foot is so cultured; it can often be found sipping Pimms with Graeme Le Saux at the theatre.

Sir Alex believes that his United team are on the verge of greatness, Wayne Rooney may have toppled over the edge. The circular forward can inspire United to derby day domination at 4/11.

It`s rumoured that Cristiano Ronaldo has been offered the lead role in a remake of the Michael Douglas classic, 'Falling Down`. The collapsible winger should be backed to score at any time at 9/4.

Biscuit magnate Eggert Magnusson has told the press that Alan Pardew`s throat will be cut if West Ham fail to perform; he`s one touch cookie. West Ham can snatch a point at the Reebok at 9/4. Nice.

Newcastle United and Robbie Savage have a lot in common, they`re both awful travellers. Somewhat surprisingly, the Toon Army have only tasted defeat at Ewood Park on one of their last eight visits; a Savage led Blackburn can buck that trend at 6/5.

Paul Jewell did a 'Baldrick` in the summer when he bought Emile Heskey, I now expect him to do 'a Blackadder` and take advantage of a rotten Boro. Wigan can leave the Riverside with three points at 13/5.

Pompey and Everton shared 1-0 wins in last season`s meet-ups, but 'no goalscorer` paid out in both matches. Only the betting naïve (like Harry 'what`s a computer` Redknapp) back a 0-0 scoreline. The 'No goalscorer` hat-trick is in play at 8/1.

Tottenham`s treatment of Jermain Defoe has left me as bemused as Monty Panesar. What could Defoe have done to deserve such shoddy treatment? Perhaps he spiked his spinach or sent Olive Oyl suggestive text messages. Spurs can beat up Charlton at 4/7, with or without the miniscule goal machine.

The wife is a big fan of Reading; she`s supported them ever since her English teacher wrote 'reading difficulties` on her school report. She`s backing the Royals at 13/8 to see off Watford; if I write out the betting slip.

It was odd to hear Neil Warnock begin a sentence with 'I`m a bit like Arsene Wenger,` as he questioned the Premier League`s schedule. That`s like the wife claiming to be 'a bit like Madonna` because she sings after lovemaking. I`m mad on a Villa win at Bramall Lane at 8/5.

Sheikh Mohammed may sound like a BNP policy, but he`s potentially the new owner of Liverpool FC. The billionaire is normally associated with the glamorous world of horse racing, where he can often be found discussing opera with Robin Van Persie`s left peg. The Reds have an easy looking match at home to Fulham, dive into the Pool at 4/11.

Man Utd, Blackburn, Liverpool, Tottenham and a Pompey draw are the virtually guaranteed selections for an 18/1 accer. Admittedly, it`s never over 'til the fat lady sings; in my house, that`s normally after 64 seconds.

Weekend Betting:

Man Utd v Man City Saturday 9th December 12:45
Live on Premiership Plus

Man Utd 4/11
Draw 10/3
Man City 9/1

Get on: Man Utd

Match Special:
Ronaldo to be booked for diving 9/1

Blackburn v Newcastle
Saturday 9th December 15:00

Blackburn 6/5
Draw 9/4
Newcastle 11/4

Get on: Blackburn

Match Special:
Blackburn to score three or more goals 4/1

Liverpool v Fulham Saturday 9th December 15:00

Liverpool 4/11
Draw 7/2
Fulham 17/2

Get on: Liverpool

Match Special:
Bellamy to score two or more goals 5/1

Middlesbrough v Wigan
Saturday 9th December 15:00

Middlesbrough 6/5
Draw 9/4
Wigan 13/5

Get on: Wigan

Match Special:
Camara to score the only goal of the game 50/1

Portsmouth v Everton
Saturday 9th December 15:00

Portsmouth 6/5
Draw 9/4
Everton 9/4

Get on: Draw

Match Special:
No goalscorer in the match 8/1

Tottenham v Charlton
Saturday 9th December 15:00

Tottenham 4/7
Draw 3/1
Charlton 11/2

Get on: Tottenham

Match Special:
Berbatov to score from outside the area 9/2

Watford v Reading
Saturday 9th December 15:00

Watford 13/8
Draw 9/4
Reading 13/8

Get on: Reading

Match Special:
Doyle to score the first goal 11/2

Bolton v West Ham
Saturday 9th December 17:15
Live on Premiership Plus

Bolton 10/11
Draw 9/4
West Ham 7/2

Get on: Draw

Match Special:
Tevez to score in a 1-1 draw 20/1

Chelsea v Arsenal
Sunday 10th December 16:00
Live on Sky

Chelsea 8/11
Draw 12/5
Arsenal 4/1

Get on: Arsenal

Match Special:
Van Persie to score direct from a free-kick 10/1

Sheff Utd v Aston Villa
Monday 11th December 20:00
Live on Sky

Sheff Utd 2/1
Draw 9/4
Aston Villa 8/5

Get on: Aston Villa

Match Special:
Villa to score a penalty 6/1

By Gerry McDonnell


Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:
Date:Friday December 8 2006
Time: 1:46PM

Comments

0
My wife looks like madonna too lol
Midge
08/12/2006 14:54:00
0
or maradonna
storagematt
08/12/2006 21:54:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Portsmouth Articles

On this day in history...4th December

A look back at this day in history, and what was happening with Pompey courtesy of our sister site PompeyRama, 4th December.

Sunday Chimes #97 - a week off but a look ahead

Grimsby next Saturday a look back, Smith almost snatches a prize, a chance to meet Motty and the tragedy of Chapecoense..

On this day in history...3rd December

A look back at this day in history, and what was happening with Pompey courtesy of our sister site PompeyRama, 3rd December.

Evans - Right back or right midfield?

Drew Talbot and Adam Buxton are fit but Gareth Evans continues to fill in at right back. Should this change? If so where would it leave the battle between Evans and Carl Baker?

Archived Vital Pompey Articles

Vital Pompey articles from

Site Journalists

pompeyrug
Editor email
Profile
eastneydave
Editor email
Profile
paultsmouth
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Change at right back? If so where would this leave Evans?
Suggested By: pompeyrug
Keep Evans at RB20%
Drop Evans. Talbot or Buxton at RB50%
Drop Baker. Evans at RM0%
Keep Barker in RM. Leave out Evans completely0%
Cookie knows best (?) In him we trust30%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Doncaster 19 12 3 4 39 14
2 Carlisle 19 10 8 1 38 14
3 Plymouth 19 12 2 5 38 8
4 Portsmouth 19 9 4 6 31 12
5 Luton 19 8 7 4 31 10
6 Yeovil 19 8 4 7 28 1
7 Wycombe 19 8 4 7 28 1
8 Blackpool 19 7 6 6 27 11
9 Barnet 19 6 9 4 27 0
10 Grimsby 19 7 5 7 26 2
11 Crewe 19 6 8 5 26 -3
12 Cambridge 19 7 4 8 25 -2
13 Mansfield 19 6 7 6 25 -4
14 Stevenage 18 7 3 8 24 -1
15 Colchester 19 6 5 8 23 1
16 Crawley 19 6 5 8 23 -11
17 Morecambe 19 7 2 10 23 -13
18 Hartlepool 19 5 7 7 22 -4
19 Notts County 19 6 4 9 22 -8
20 Accrington 19 5 6 8 21 -5
21 Exeter 19 6 2 11 20 -5
22 Leyton Orient 19 5 3 11 18 -5
23 Cheltenham 19 3 9 7 18 -8
24 Newport 18 4 5 9 17 -5
Write for Vital Football
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
The Vital Football Members League

Recent Portsmouth Results (view all)

Portsmouth Fixtures (view all)

Dec 10 2016 3:00PM : Grimsby Town (a)
Sky Bet League Two
Dec 17 2016 3:00PM : Hartlepool United (H)
Sky Bet League Two
Dec 26 2016 3:00PM : Newport County (a)
Sky Bet League Two
Dec 31 2016 3:00PM : Yeovil Town (a)
Sky Bet League Two
Jan 2 2017 3:00PM : Luton Town (H)
Sky Bet League Two
Jan 5 2017 7:45PM : Doncaster Rovers (a)
Sky Bet League Two

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.eastneydave5
2.Copnor434
3.storagematt2
4.PompeyFrippy1
5.Dorking Pompey1
Vital Football Comment